The Onion

Apr 23

Neighborhood Kids Grant Landmark Status To House Where Guy Killed Himself

Neighborhood Kids Grant Landmark Status To House Where Guy Killed Himself

Activists Release Horrifying Video Showing How Meat Products Are Eaten

Activists Release Horrifying Video Showing How Meat Products Are Eaten

Perverted Little Boy Asks To Sleep With Parents

Perverted Little Boy Asks To Sleep With Parents

Report: U.S. Still Leads World With Highest Density Of Kevins

Report: U.S. Still Leads World With Highest Density Of Kevins

Apr 22

Autopsy Determines Total Loser’s Corpse Contained No Traces Of Drugs, Alcohol

Autopsy Determines Total Loser’s Corpse Contained No Traces Of Drugs, Alcohol

Casinos Getting People To Play Longer By Telling Them Rest Of Civilization Destroyed

Casinos Getting People To Play Longer By Telling Them Rest Of Civilization Destroyed

Visit Home Referred To As Vacation By Parents

Visit Home Referred To As Vacation By Parents

Obama Spends Another Night Searching Behind White House Paintings For Safes

Obama Spends Another Night Searching Behind White House Paintings For Safes

Study: Home Rotisseries Only American Technological Field Still Advancing

Study: Home Rotisseries Only American Technological Field Still Advancing